Loving Life's Mystery

by Cindy
(California, Sac)

Hi, My name is Cindy. I am 39 years old. My life is very difficult every day because I feel lonely sometimes. I have depression or manic-depression and work with my doctor. Once I developed a theory as I called it to win the lottery. I have tried over and over to make the theory work again but it won't. It worked in 2002 but I decided not to play the ticket and it won with also the megs number winning with it. Since then I have saved a girl's life at the bus stop. She had epilepsy. My medical doctor said she very well might have died that day if I wasn't there to know what to do when others didn't. I am very kind but life has been difficult and now I live in a mobile home and people seem to be unkind to me here. I just wish I could go somewhere where people didn't judge me so much for being bipolar or for being me. It kinda makes me upset because I have been nothing but nice to everyone here. Even with all of my suffering I have received God's love and he has comforted me. Jesus seems to come through and when other let me down I go to him. I am too nervous to write to a philanthropist to tell my story . There is a lot more to tell. I guess they would help you if they felt your life was tragic enough. My life has been tragic and continues to be because I no longer talk to certain family members . My dream was to own my own perfume store or having a nice house out of California would have been nice. I am still working at it. I want to leave California so much and this mobile home park too. I guess the reward for doing good things for others gives you a sense that you yourself are a good person and that is sometimes one of the most valuable things a person can realize about themselves. Sometimes doing good deeds for others is not necessarily getting recognition back but finding a part of you that is very wonderful.....